My 2 Month Transformation Experiment (The Grind)
"Success does not follow ideas; success follows hard work" -Nolan Bushnell
Who Have I Been?
In order to really Transform, one must first know who and what they are changing from. It's not just a matter of changing a few behaviors. It's a matter of self recreation in a particular area of your life. Whether it's physical appearance, career, family, etc. In order to Transform in those areas, it's a matter of becoming someone else.
I've tried going on a diet. It doesn't work for the long haul. The food that I consumed wasn't the real problem. Me eating the wrong foods for my goals was the problem. Emphasis on 'Me'! If I can't get 'Me' to believe enough in myself and in the plausibility of me attaining my goals, I won't stay on any diet long enough to receive long term benefits. In fact I will yoyo diet, because my mind is in between being the disciplined person, that can and will comply with the diet, or the undisciplined person that can't comply with the diet.
What we're really looking for is a personality.
That's why when I was reading Erik's question in The Spark and Grind, "So which are you today? A grinder like I was? Or an Igniter?"
My answer that I literally wrote in the book was this. " Me I'm an Igniter that grinds harder for my 9 to 5 than for myself. I've allowed myself to be disenchanted with the Grind because of my previous programming."
So who I have been?
Truth be told.... I have been a Half Asser
I come up with great ideas ( Sparks). I go to work on them immediately with great vigor and focus ( Grind). I run into obstacles and lose steam on my goals.
Why do I do that? I asked myself that question and I got a cool answer in the form of a picture at my CrossFit gym.
" Obstacles are what you see when you take your eye off your goal".
Who do I need to Be(come)?
There's an energy that you get when you're fully engaged in being the man or woman that you desire to Be. Instead of just accepting your picked out reality, you consciously decide to become a different person. This person has different habits, different options, and a different thought process. All of that together produces a whole new set of experiences.
One day I was dirt tired after working for over 12 hrs. I came home briefly to change clothes and leave out for the gym. I wanted to go and all, but I was so tired that the thought of doing anything else made me want to put my thumb in my mouth and call for my mommy . I forced myself to my car and battled with drowsiness halfway through the drive to the gym.
But on that drive I discovered a secret that has forever changed my life. I discovered how to access energy in me that I didn't even know was there.
I became something different. I literally rewired my brain. I knew that this mind stuff worked. Heck, I taught it to others. But when you have to practice what you preach, it's a whole new ball game.
That's what I did, I practiced what I preached. In that car I became a more driven and energized version of myself. I went to the gym and smashed my workout.
The thing is, is that I did not practice this new way of being enough. So I never got good at being this more driven 'Me'.
It was uncomfortable and sometimes scary practicing being this guy.
" I needed to experience the beauty of the unknown in order to break free of always needing the known."- Erik Wahl
Plain and simple, I have to become Desperate enough to become comfortable with the discomfort of transformation. I'm becoming a different person for Pete's sake, it's supposed to be hard. If it wasn't everyone would do it.
Desperate people do whatever it takes to get whatever it is that that they want. The reason why they're able to get what they're after is really simple. What they are after is not just a want, it's a need. Folks, Desperate people's needs must be met!!!
I Trust The Process
"If you are tired of starting over, stop quitting." - Unknown
I have started and stopped so many times in this process of Transformation, because I simply did not trust in the process. I worked and worked, and yet when I viewed myself all I saw was a person that needed to do more. While that was true, I needed to do more work to achieve the results I desired. I was approaching the situation from the perspective of the glass being half empty instead of half full. This of course discouraged me. And what do we do when we're discouraged? We run away from it by means of unhealthy coping mechanisms. Mine was overeating, complaining, watching too much television, and sex. Hey I'm keeping it real!
I didn't have enough why's to keep me motivated and I was blind. What I mean by all of this is that I didn't have enough reasons to continue on the right path outside of me wanting to have the coveted six-pack. That was my main motivation, my appearance. The thing about that 'why' is that it was not an original idea of mine. I thought that people would like me better or rather find me more attractive if I looked a certain way. That type of 'why' won't sustain you through the tough times of Transformation, because it's not rooted deep enough within to have a substantial root system. In other words, it's not strong enough.
This is one of the main reasons so many of us fail each year at dropping excess weight. We can't drop the opinions of others from our minds.
My blindness was a matter of me not being able to see all of the progress that I actually made. Blind eyes are ungrateful eyes. Ungrateful eyes always see lack and hard times.
Why would I want to train and go through grinding process of Transformation, if all that I saw was pain. My very conception of my reality was literally hijacking my results.
Something had to change. I had to fall in love with the process.....
" The key is to fall in love with the discipline. This is the secret or rather the missing ingredient."- Donald Jeanlewis
" When who you are is attached to what you do, striving for excellence excited you instead of burdening you. Your drive to see an endeavor through is fueled by passion and purpose instead of mere duty or obligation." Erik Wahl
Basically I have to do as Winston Churchill said, "at first we shape our life's work and then it shapes us".
In other words, I have to fall in love with the process so much so, until the process overtakes me, and shapes me in it's image and likeness.
What is my action plan? I have my Spark (Why). Now I need my Grind (Daily Action Steps).
I'm just gonna get straight to the point.
1) Train consistently.
2) Eat what my diet dictates. Don't cheat. When I cheat, I literally cheat myself in more ways than one. I cheat myself out of accomplishing my goal in a timely manner. More importantly I cheat my mind. By not honoring my commitments that I make with myself, I convince my subconscious mind not to take me seriously, especially when it comes to my goals.
3) Get enough rest. I have tried it too many times, and the answer is always the same. Without enough rest, I end up making a mess
Rest and recovery are crucial ingredients that are needed in this type of transformation. You can't train if you don't have enough energy to.
4) Treat my website like it's already a success. I will be honest. I haven't been as engaged as I know I should have in my website. I have subconsciously been waiting for people to show up, so that I can start being consistent with my post's. I know about metaphysics. I know about the spiritual law's that govern this world. Instead of believing it when I see it. I have to see it before I see it.
5) I have to have laser like focus on the achievement of my goals alone for this season of my life. In other words, I have to mind my own damn business.
6) I'm mentioning this last, but actually it's first. I must form and adhere to a morning ritual that will usher me into the day with power and clarity. I have an awesome ritual. When I do it, I experience awesome days. If my ritual is so powerful, why don't I do it everyday?
The answer is that I don't do the stuff that I mentioned up top consistently. If I eat poorly I generally wake up feeling drained or bloated. This consumes my attention in the morning, and not to mention I don't have much time because I wake up around midnight to get to work. If I don't get enough rest, I wake up hugging the covers for dear life. That leaves very little time or concern for meditation or a gratitude practice.
The only solution is for me to take a firm stance, and demand better of myself. This ladies and gentlemen calls for a word that's not popular with our society, but it's still much needed. I have to Deny myself. Yep, I have to first analyze my day to day patterns. See where I'm wasting time ( Energy). Next, I have to make it a must that I don't repeat those patterns. This folks is mindful living on steroids.
That's it I'm done talking. Talking too much takes me away from my Grind.